Ship's Log: Chinese Pirates

May ye have the luck of a Tiger,

Thar first few pirate event, a number of landlubber say they never heard of Chinese Pirates. One day I plan ta get a small Chinese junk or sampan of me very own.

I have thar pleasure of sayin' Chinese Pirates now be recognized in thar press: a Series of articles in Pirates Magazine about Koxinga, terror of the South China Sea n' Chinese Pirates & the Dutch East India Company, an article in CNN about Cheng I Sao - Most successful pirate was beautiful and tough, an Pirate of the Caribbean: At World's End featuring Chinese Pirates - Chow Yun-Fat, arrrr!

Ship’s Log: Muskegon Pirate Festival, 8-25-07

Blow me down,

I be flyin’ right into Chicago with tornados n’ electrical blackouts. Thar Muskegon Pirate Festival might be small but it be loads of fun n’ profitable. Them thar fellow brethren treated me like a high pyrate lord. I dare say, Lake Michigan almost be as big as one of the seven seas.

As always I be searchin’ fer wenches, me found many. Saturday night I had a bit too much rum at Capt Jack’s Restaurant, which be right across thar road ta thieves market. I look forward ta boardin' thar land of Great Lakes again.

Ship's Log: Big Bear Renaissance Faire, 8-19-07

Yar Highess,

When the tide be low, Tiger be forced to look fer plunder at thar Big Bear Renaissance Faire . Faire be great places to be bodice watchin', as treasured chest be everywhere ye look. Even the Royal Court of St. Katherine's took notice of me work n' commissioned me to craft a number of portraits of the royal court.

When picken' be slow, a desparate pyrate might even grab a wench from an puritian guild n' put her in iron. I flogged that thar repressed wench til she repented.

Ship's Log: Rollercon, 8-9-07

Prepare to be boarded mates,

I traveled the Las Wages, NV to visit them thar Molly Roger Roller Derby Team. As they be attendin' RollerCon , the 3rd annual convention of women's roller derby teams. The sport grew like wild fire after the TV program RollerGirls aired on cable. There are over 100 teams n' many be sporting pyrate symbols.

I got to know the 8 team members that come down from Florida: Rue Morgue, Habeas Corpus,Holly Hacksaw, Garbage Pail Kid, Buxom Basher, Davy Jones' Blocker, Mama Bear& Ginger Rum Punch. We took some team shots infront of them thar pirate ships infront of Treasure Island n' gathered a crowd of spectators. I also did a photoshot with Megan, as a potential 2009 Calendar Model.

Ship's Log: Kinky Pirate Ball

Damn me soul,

If ye be into perversion of a dark kind, then dare to attend thar Kinky Pirate Ball at te El Ray Theatre in LA on Saturday, Sept 1, 2007. Me friend, Robert Fluty the creator of Kinky in the Caribbean, be puttin' this adventure. I you see that they be using one of me hot pirate babes in their marketin'.

I be settin' up me Olde Tyme Pyrate Photo Booth, so here be an opportunity to get a custom fine art pirate portrait. Damn me eyes if it ain't time to be searchin' fer buxon wenches fer the 2009 calendar. If you got the goods then display them, arrrr!

Ship's Log: A Pyrate's Life Party, 8-4-07

Good fortune attend ye!

This be the morning after thar Calendar Release Partee, n' what a partee it be. 169 rabble rousing buccaneers board the beachs of Mission Bay to sword fight, feast on alligator sauage, talk the pyrate tongue, be entertained by fire breathers n' dancers. Oh, yea! to drink lots of ale n' some most wonderful navy grog. Fer some reason I had lot of lemon tea left over, but no rum!

Me four wanton wench signed the 2008 Hot Pirate Babe Calendars by tiki torches. Pirates as far as Alaska, France, New Orleans, Arizona n' Colorado come to me partee n' say it be worth the long voyage n' be plannin' to attend new year.