Shiver me timbers,
My fellow freebooter, Jack Dagger, send me this like to an article on Dating Advice from Knife-Thrower from Nerve. This be a photo I took of him n' his lovely target a few years ago, back in the day when I help develop personal brands.
Jack Dagger, "The King of Fling" recognized by the International Knife-throwers Hall of Fame performed at my 1st "A Pyrates Life Party". Here be an image I took of him in his pirate garb with his target, Tanya.
Shiver me timbers,
At yer service,
Fer all ye freebooters in distant ports that have been wantin' a grand Pirate Portraits of yerself, but can make it into my home port of San Diego, I now offer a Send in your own photo service. This makes a perfect gift fer the pyrate lover who has chest full of every imaginable treasure in the seven seas, yarrr!
Speaking of gifts, 2008 Hot Pirate Babes Calendar make wonderful boot stuffers fer the men folk in yer life or Molly Roger Wench Wear fer the sausy pirette in yer life.
By all that is good n' great,
I have pleasure in saying that thar lastest issue of Pirate's Magazine is out. It be featuring me brand new column, called "A Siren's Call" where I be searching fer women pirates in the modern world. This is a the 5th issue of the quarterly publication, which can be found at yer local Borders Bookstore.
Also included in me column is the Pirate Pin-Up, this issue features Diana Knight of the Rum Runners. I be holdin' a model search for each issue (someone's gota do it, it might as well be me). So all ye wench who thinks they got what I be looking fer, then visit me website Hot Pirate Babes, yarrr!
Ello Bilge Rats,
Thar Arizona Corsair be holdin' thar virgin Buccaneer Ball. It be grand meetin' more pirates holdin' pyrate events in landlocked ports. As always, first time events be a bit rough around the edges, especial more dancing. I would love to see many more buccaneer balls on thar horizon. As a vendor, I did quiet well. So thanks to all ye folks that allowed me the pleasure to craft a fine art pirate portraits. It was good to vend next to No Quarter Given, the best website to keep up with pirate events, yarrr!
By the blood of Henry Morgan,
I be at water edge in Vinoy Park at thar port of Saint Petersburg, vending at the 5th Annual Florida Pirate Festival. The 3 day event be a bit light in attendance but heavy in performance. They had a wonderful staff of krew members n' a grand fight circle that put on well choreographed melee of up to 30 fighters.
I held one of me model search for the 2009 Hot Pirate Babe calendar. Sink n' scuttle me, if I didn't get a fine selection of wenches to pick from.
Damn me eyes,
This be the third week in me voyage to Florida, which be one of much bad omens. As I tried to attend thar Pirate Week in the Caymen Islands, but they didn't accept me, then I hooked up with the Saint Arrrgustine Pirate Gathering, but they cancelled 3 days before I left fer my voyage. So at last minute I applied to thar Sarasota Medieval Fair n' be accepted.
To my surprise I discovered it be a dry event - no rum or ale. Attendance be low n' sale be even lower, no plunder here. But I did get one beatiful assisant, Nikki, to pass the day by floggin' her n' teachin' her to sword fight, arrrr!
Happy All Hallow's Day,
Silver me timbers, the Divers Equipment Manufactors Association hired me to dress 200 of thar folk as pirates n' take photo of them fer there DEMA Awards Show caues thar them be Pirates this year. They gave me a booth at thar trade show, where I got a few scuba diver shops to carry the Molly Roger product line.
It seems like them diver like pirates, as they be still searchin' fer our long lost treasure. Thar treasure I found be the many lovely mermaids lounging around the show.
Eye Poppin Treasured Chest,
This be me kick off event fer my one month voyage to Florida, where real pirates sailed thar oceans. Fantasy Fest be a 10 day event of debauchery held on Key West, an island that be closer to Cuba than Miami.
I arrive on Thursday n' visited the Pirate Soul Museum n' saw many a real pirate artifacts. I set up me booth at the Fantasy Fest Street Fair on Friday n' sold many a Molly Roger shirts. Then I be a special judge at the Rum Barrel Pirate Bash - Costume Contest, where I be holding a Hot Pirate Babe search.
The highlight of this week long is the body paint of women. Hundreds of women proudly display their uncovered treasure chest in public, what a sight to see for all ye salty sea dogs. Captain Morgan puts on a huge parade of floats. I started out takin' photo from the side, but it boring, so I crashed the parade n' joined one of the many pirate groups in the parade. I didn't have any beads to give out, so I took photos of painted women n' gave them a flogging instead, yarrr!
In the desert of Las Vegas, I seek fortune at the Age of Chivalry, one massive Renaissance faire of 50,000 folk in one weekend. This be one interesting fantasy faire with The Wild, Vikings, Belly Dancers, Gladiators, Scottish, Fairies, Queen & her court n' Pirates, arrrr!
I be one tired pyrate, doing a Moroccan Party, driving all night to do a 3 day faire which starts 10 in the morning n' last till 10 at night. This be me most profitable 3 day weekend fer my Dress Like a Pirate Photo Booth, but the dust did me in with a horrible cough. As alway I keep a weather eye fer Hot Pirate Babes.
May treasure rain upon ye,
Spectrum Communication hired me two years ago to create a Dress Like A Pirate Photo Booth, which got me first started in pyrates. Now they had me create a Dress Like A Moroccan Photo Booth for this years CEPTA convention.
Moroccan pirates, who be called Corsairs where famous for attacking Christain Ships on the Medierranean Ocean. So now I be addin' Moroccan Pirates to my pirate photo booth. Here be me old images called thar "Desert Edge".
Storm Seas Abound,
I brought a load of booty over to the General Store at 2 Harbor fer thar 18th Annual Buccaneer Days. I took the local ferry, the Catalina Express on friday, which be the harshest sea me damn eyes have ever a seen, arrrugh. The tall ship, American Pride had to be rescue on her return vovage from Catalina Island, all sea traffic be cancelled fer the rest of the day. A day trip turned into an entire weekend. Marooned on a desert island with a thousand partyin' pyrates. It be rewardin' seeing scores of wenches wearin' the mark of the Molly Roger.
The British gave me quarter on thar ship, me first time sleeping on the water, a small 20 foot boat with waves lapping all night. It be quite refreshing not havin' to work a photo booth, all I do is drink rum n' look for potential Hot Pirate Babe Models. Life be rough fer a rogue like me, but someone gotta do it. I entered the costume contest, be a finalist fer best pirate n' most original, but lost to a rat n' a parrot.
Here's luck n' fair wind to ye,
The Molly Roger being so popular, I have begin wholesalin' thar produce line. So I went to me first merchant show, the Las Vegas Resort Gift Show. Captain Starwise provided me his 10 foot ship's mast to decorate me booth, ain't she a beauty!
I had high hopes fer the show, but it provided slim pickin'. I did sell some of me ware to the General Store at 2 Harbor on Catalina Island, who invited me to thar Buccaneer Day's next week.
I give ye hearty greetin',
This be the busiest pirate weekend of the year, fer thar be dozens of pirate festival happenin'. I be settin' up me Olde Tyme Dress Like A Pyrate Photo Booth at Ojai Pirate Faire, the biggest pirate festival in Southern Califorina. This year they be expandin' it to 2 weekends, it being so popular.
I be seeing many a olde mates n' and a few new ones. Thar be many a new pyrate guilds poppin' up that you be thinkin' that it be the second golden age of piracy!
This be the international day fer all common folk to Talk Like a Pirate! Cruised up to me mates Clay at his Ye Olde Studio City Tattoo , where he be celebratin' this day by providing pirate tattoos, music n' fun. Even Cap'n Slappy n' Ol'Chumbucket the original creator of Talk Like A Pirate Day drop by to get thar first tattoo.
After way I made me way down to Enchanted Deva to where many o' pirate soul be gatherin' to watch performance. A beautiful troup of pirate belly dancer provided an eyeful.
Celebrate Me Birthday,
Oceanside Harbor Days been goin' fer many years, but this be thar first time with pyrates. The start be a bit slow, but it picked up later in the day. A mighty 6 pounder be crewed by all female, arrr! They had a nice gun battle between two tall ships n' 30 pirates with lots of black powered. I celebrated me birthday at the Jolly Roger Restaurant, got a wee bit drunk on a new drink, it be called Creamy KUM (Kahlua + Rum n' Milk).
The second day be even better since they put a bus stop right in front of me booth. I sold a record number of Molly Roger Wenchwear, especially the new booty shorts. Mark me words, this event be a grand treasure next year!
This be one of the first festival.that I didn't have a photo booth, which I have a few choice words for them survy dogs. But I made the most of it n' found a sloop that be needin' an extra crew member. The water be a bit rough n' some of them got sea sick, so half way though they disembarked. I some grand shot of the tall ships, yarrrr!
A wenchin' we will go,
Kinky Pirate Ball not be yar normal pirate event, but what a fest fer me salty sea eyes. It's been some time since I've charted thar realm of the fetish world, saw many old friends. I had numerous strumpets tell me that they be lookin' at me calendar fer thar inspiratation fer them their pyrate costume!
Many luscious maidens expressed their intereste in be in the next Hot Pirate Babe Calendar. Thar be Veronique, a top candidate. So many hard choices in life, far too many wicked wenches, yarrrr!
May ye have the luck of a Tiger,
Thar first few pirate event, a number of landlubber say they never heard of Chinese Pirates. One day I plan ta get a small Chinese junk or sampan of me very own.
I have thar pleasure of sayin' Chinese Pirates now be recognized in thar press: a Series of articles in Pirates Magazine about Koxinga, terror of the South China Sea n' Chinese Pirates & the Dutch East India Company, an article in CNN about Cheng I Sao - Most successful pirate was beautiful and tough, an Pirate of the Caribbean: At World's End featuring Chinese Pirates - Chow Yun-Fat, arrrr!
Blow me down,
I be flyin’ right into Chicago with tornados n’ electrical blackouts. Thar Muskegon Pirate Festival might be small but it be loads of fun n’ profitable. Them thar fellow brethren treated me like a high pyrate lord. I dare say, Lake Michigan almost be as big as one of the seven seas.
As always I be searchin’ fer wenches, me found many. Saturday night I had a bit too much rum at Capt Jack’s Restaurant, which be right across thar road ta thieves market. I look forward ta boardin' thar land of Great Lakes again.
When the tide be low, Tiger be forced to look fer plunder at thar Big Bear Renaissance Faire . Faire be great places to be bodice watchin', as treasured chest be everywhere ye look. Even the Royal Court of St. Katherine's took notice of me work n' commissioned me to craft a number of portraits of the royal court.
When picken' be slow, a desparate pyrate might even grab a wench from an puritian guild n' put her in iron. I flogged that thar repressed wench til she repented.
Prepare to be boarded mates,
I traveled the Las Wages, NV to visit them thar Molly Roger Roller Derby Team. As they be attendin' RollerCon , the 3rd annual convention of women's roller derby teams. The sport grew like wild fire after the TV program RollerGirls aired on cable. There are over 100 teams n' many be sporting pyrate symbols.
I got to know the 8 team members that come down from Florida: Rue Morgue, Habeas Corpus,Holly Hacksaw, Garbage Pail Kid, Buxom Basher, Davy Jones' Blocker, Mama Bear& Ginger Rum Punch. We took some team shots infront of them thar pirate ships infront of Treasure Island n' gathered a crowd of spectators. I also did a photoshot with Megan, as a potential 2009 Calendar Model.
Labels: Molly Roger
Damn me soul,
If ye be into perversion of a dark kind, then dare to attend thar Kinky Pirate Ball at te El Ray Theatre in LA on Saturday, Sept 1, 2007. Me friend, Robert Fluty the creator of Kinky in the Caribbean, be puttin' this adventure. I you see that they be using one of me hot pirate babes in their marketin'.
I be settin' up me Olde Tyme Pyrate Photo Booth, so here be an opportunity to get a custom fine art pirate portrait. Damn me eyes if it ain't time to be searchin' fer buxon wenches fer the 2009 calendar. If you got the goods then display them, arrrr!
Good fortune attend ye!
This be the morning after thar Calendar Release Partee, n' what a partee it be. 169 rabble rousing buccaneers board the beachs of Mission Bay to sword fight, feast on alligator sauage, talk the pyrate tongue, be entertained by fire breathers n' dancers. Oh, yea! to drink lots of ale n' some most wonderful navy grog. Fer some reason I had lot of lemon tea left over, but no rum!
Me four wanton wench signed the 2008 Hot Pirate Babe Calendars by tiki torches. Pirates as far as Alaska, France, New Orleans, Arizona n' Colorado come to me partee n' say it be worth the long voyage n' be plannin' to attend new year.
Avast ye sirens,
Comic Con has scores of artwork, but one in particular caught me eye. That of Alain Viesca, who I also met at Glamorcon last year. He be masterful in his pirate pin-up art.
He paints a wonderful series of Liquor fairies,such as the Marini Fairy, Tequila Fairy, German Beer Fairy and of the Saki Fairy. Me favorite being the Rum Faire of course. I be havin' delightful visions of nude wenches everytime I drink too much rum!
Labels: Pirate Art
Here be luck n' fair wind to ye,
I be attendin' San Diego Comic Con fer half a score, it be growin' to as big as the Evil East Indian Mouse Company. Luck be with me n' I meet with Pirate n' Faerie Magazine on thursday, but thar booth be a bit sparce. I offered to bring some of me pyrate props n' some of my wares, which they gladly accepted. I dressed some of thar wench n' taugh them to fight with a cutlass.
I just picked up me new 2008 Hot Pirate Babe Calendar on monday n' since Pirates Magazine be one of my proud sponsor, we had them calendars available fer sale at Comic Con. Them calendar be a big hit with the many pirates that be passing by. Some of me fans be purchasing me tanktops n' dressin' right in thar booth, yarrrr!
Party Like it's 1699,
Last year I threw me first pirate party, the entire krewe had a blast. So here we be a mere 2 weeks til the 2nd A Pyrate's Life Party. This partee be thee Official 2008 Hot Pirate Babe release, so every pirate or couple be gettin' there very own sign copy of the new calendar.
Damn me eyes, thar be more: 4 course Cajon feast, all ye can drink gorg, ale or lemon-tea, sword fighting classes, how to talk like a pirate lesson, learn some pyrate drinkin' song, followed by pirate dinner show by Pirates for Hire, Fire Dance by StarDust, Music by thee Doxie Chicks, n' a special Pirate gogo dance. Attend me partee n' be blessed with plentyful booty.
A merry life n' a good one,
I be firing a 21 gun salute fer today be the memorial service for Don Paulson, a cowboy trick roper & actor. What in the 7 seas does that have to do with Pirates? Don’s son be Ted Shred, of Pirates for Hire, the rogue who got me involved with piracy. Don n’ me father, David owned a Chinese-Mexican-American food restaurant in the oceanless desert of Phoenix, AZ when Ted n’ I be mere young powder munkeys wet behind thar ears.
Bosen Shred n’ I had not seen each other for over 25 year when we meet up again. We be supportin’ each other in various projects fer the past 8 year. Here be one of the few images of us, as I am always behind the magic picture taken box instead of in front of it. It be wise to have a trusted mate watch ye back.
Labels: Pirates for Hire
Yo Ho n' a Bottle of Rum,
Red-Hand Mary signed up fer me A Pyrate's Life Party and told me about how her krewe build a pirate ship in the backyard. This be way better than any treehouse.
There be 19 Plank Owner to commissioned n' built this might fine party sloop over a years time n' you can see pictures at Red Dragon's Revenge. I be looking in me backyard to see if I can fit a Chinese Junk, garrr!